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So, it happened again. What my dad affectionately refers to as my “accidental shopping” problem. It starts innocently enough. I go out, usually with the intention of simply getting from A to B, sometimes to buy a birthday present for someone or to help a friend find the perfect seduction underwear to take on a scientific research trip to Peru (don’t ask). I won’t shop, I think. You could call me naïve but the truth is that I’m clearly lying to myself and we all know it. And that is how I end up tonight, on my bed, grinning avariciously at my purchases, like a kid in a candy shop, a magpie in Swarovski, Cruella in Doggy Day Care.

Clearly I have a problem. And so I thought, what would be better? Should I a.) Become less obsessed with fashion? Or b.) Start a blog where I can ramble endlessly about clothes, jewels, bags, footstools (yes, I love them!), shoes and just about anything else that takes my fancy, thus further feeding my rampant lust for style and general fabulousness?

You’ll never guess what I went for…

So, I’m starting a fashion blog. Well, everyone does it right? Soon, uploading your outfit picture will be as much a part of one’s morning routine as having a nervous breakdown because you can’t find the right bra to match your mood (oh, just me?). But I need a USP, right? All blogs must have a schtick, otherwise they would just be schtuck. (I crack myself up). Well, here’s mine: My Unique Selling Point is that I do not have a Unique Selling Point.

Ooh, crazy I know. But here’s the thing. I am not a fashion student/aspiring designer looking to make a name for myself. I am not a model. I do not have a flashy job that requires me to dress fashionably. I am neither “fashion-size” nor “plus-size”. I am not a stylist. I am not fabulously wealthy with a Birkin for every occasion. I am a 26 year old girl who has never met a pair of earrings she didn’t like. I love clothes, accessories, jewellery, style, fashion. I love things that are classic and elegant and I love things that are ridiculous and will get me mocked.  (That’s right Tara, I will not stop wearing my new pink hat just because you asked why I was wearing a condom on my head.) I love dressing my sisters, my friends and honestly, I would love nothing more than to go up to strangers on the street and give them my opinions too, if I didn’t think I would get into trouble. (Although it’s only a matter of time…)

I believe in being stylish, simply because it’s polite, nice, good for you but most of all, SUPERDUPERTOTALLYFUN. And that is my main goal with fashion. Enjoy it, worship it, love it, study it, analyse it, find it endlessly fascinating but never take it too seriously. If you can’t have fun with your clothes you may as well be naked (which to be fair can be pretty fun too….) As far as I am concerned- if life is a meal, then fashion is the dessert.

And I do love me some ice-cream….

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That’s, ahem, me on the right…

So, to begin, I thought I’d share my newest accidental purchases (because showing people what you bought is at least 60% of the fun, right? My long-suffering sister, who isn’t really into fashion (our survey says: adopted) may beg to differ but, you know, she’ll learn to love it…)

So. Here goes:

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The aforementioned pink hat. (River Island) Seen here with my so-90s-it-hurts outfit (t-shirts under dresses will never stop reminding me of all the cool girls on TV I longed to be when I was younger) and then with the outfit my boyfriend described as my “Flava Flav look”.

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Worryingly, he may have a point…

Also from River Island:

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These swooshy bright blue tassel earrings, that were on sale!

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And: these sensible but kinda sexy boots that I will mostly be wearing to work.

And in keeping with the sensible shoes theme, I then went to New Look and purchased…

THESE:

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Which I can already tell I’ll never wear but I just couldn’t resist! Plus I was excited that New Look have finally started making shoes that actually fit on my, ahem, sizeable feet. And they have a slight Charlotte Olympia vibe, which I love, but for £34.99, which I love more!

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I also picked up this little number, which I plan to wear with a short sleeved white tee underneath or a white button down shirt on top (tied at the waist of course. Well I did tell you I was into the 90s…)

Then, whilst trying to meet a friend, I suddenly found myself in the changing room queue in Forever 21, begging her forgiveness for my perennial tardiness over the phone. 15 minutes later, off I ran, the proud owner of this plaid shirt:

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(pictured with the LOVE necklace I bought in River Island at the same time as the hat and the boots)

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And this garish jumper, that has been roundly laughed at, but I think could look really cool with tight black trousers and heels.

Having met up with my friend (after a further 10 minutes of texting “I’m by the stairs, where are you?” “I’m in the shoes” “I’m in the shoes now, where are you” “I’m in the downstairs bit with the young ppl stuff, come down” “Can’t find u!” “Oops sorry I’m getting froyo! Meet here” “Now I’m just in Karen Millen, soz! Get me froyo!!” “With marshmallows?” “Obvs!” etc. etc.) we went to Urban Outfitters (ostensibly because she needed a bag and I needed a necklace stand.) One paisley dress and one omg-so-Cher-Horowitz dress later….

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I just figure when the high street is cutting for your shape (90s = everything has a slight flare at the hips, perfect), you have to strike while you can. Soon 20s drop-waists and 60s shifts will be back in and I’ll be doomed once more.

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My friend with the Peruvian seduction designs dragged me to Victoria’s Secret, (I’ve never been to the one in London before, it is massive!) and I got this cute little number (which is less shiny in the flesh!), while she spent the actual GDP of Peru on assorted purple bras and pants.

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A quick pit stop to Zara, where I ummed and ahhed but eventually caved and bought this sexy secretary dress aaaaaand we’re done.

Honestly.

No, really.

And that is definitely it for a while (I can feel my card giving me evils every time I pass my wallet. The tension is kind of getting to me…) but I love all of it!

(I will eventually graduate to pictures of how I wear these things etc. but go easy on me, this is my first post and I’m a bit shy/embarrassed! I also promise not to make every post as long and rambly as this one!)

So, any thoughts?

Thanks for stopping by! 🙂

Love,

The Styletterie

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